Oh boy, these are murky waters to explore, and I honestly don't like crawling into these dark holes because one never knows what's going to pop out at the other end. I think sometimes people just don't care to 'hear' the story. It seems like there's always a difference of opinion, and its always about a new issue. It becomes tiresome for everyone to deal with I think. Regarding issues of implicit versus explicit rules of power, my Foundational Studies 200 course touched on quite a bit of ground concerning issues of race, education regarding black versus white education, city governments and overall white privilege.
The 5 issues of power listed ring true to a degree, and the hardest to swallow is number 5. In a way, I believe it to be true, but in another way I want to reject it because it basically asserts that someone is at fault, and I don't mind taking fault if i really am at fault, but It's difficult to agree with. When I took my UF 200 course, I was like "am I really going to be held accountable for the sins of this country's forefathers. Am I really an active participant in a system of oppression which still lives-on today on so many levels, or which I had given absolutely zero thought until one minute ago when I was told it was such?!" It was hard to wrap my head around, but after some time I was able to accept and agree with parts of the argument. Since it comes up so often, I have no doubt that people of color do indeed sense, feel, see, and live with this power struggle all around them. I truly don't believe they're making it up. When reading about these issues I always arrive at the same conclusion, which is more of a question without a distinct answer. "What am I to do about it?" Like I said, I don't know the answer. If I'm candid, I wish the issue didn't exist because I find the whole situation to be an annoying hindrance to my busy life and personal goals.
Like the reading suggests, most of us are oblivious to it and wish to remain that way, but if we remain that way then we're called out for it. There's really no hiding from it anymore. Then if I feel like I want to say something and at least admit that I see a problem with acknowledgement but that I don't know what to do about it, its like I feel hushed for even finally wanting to talk about it because I'm using my white privilege to hog the conversation by even being willing to begin speaking about it. I have felt like I'm damned if i do, and damned if I don't (discuss it and explore it openly).
When we express a want and desire for all to have equality and opportunity, only the status quo is upheld and that doesn't satisfy because we're just meeting at the fifty yard line, unwilling to give up the power. I understand the dilemma here, but if the tables were turned would people of color be willing to go beyond equal, making themselves the less powerful component and breaking the limit of the status quo? Hmm. Again, damned if we do and damned if we don't. Perhaps I'm a bit tired and my mind isn't quite getting to where we really solve the issue and everyone wins. I don't mean to imply that I think there should be winners and losers, or that there even are, because admitting things like that opens up an even bigger can of worms. Its tiring as my mind goes in circles all over again about these issues. I don't even want to face it, but then I feel like a guilty oppressive jackass.
Jeff,
ReplyDeleteI sense your discomfort but it is good to be uncomfortable, especially when talking about issues that matter like race, class, and education. I can see how someone from the culture of power who is forced to acknowledge it would automatically be defensive, hence the concept of veiled power and Delpit's fifth aspect... power is not something openly discussed. So when you are first forced to contemplate it within the context of your own life it is shocking to learn you are the privileged product of an oppressive, hierarchical system. It reminds me of Plato's cave allegory, when you finally see the light it burns because it challenges everything you thought you knew. It can be a hard pill to swallow, but viewing privilege an "us" vs "them" dichotomy is problematic. I don't think you have to feel personally blamed because it is not a personal issue but rather a systemic one, a dominant ideology constructed from conglomerated historical events. I suggest you continue to participate in this conversation leaving behind a "damned if i do, damned if I don't" mentality. No one is out to get you, I think it is more about recognizing the aspects of power in the system we live in and contemplating how we can see them in daily life.
Hi Addie, thank you for your response. I am encouraged by your educated, mature and move-forward attitude. I was defensive at first because growing up in Boise the late 90's and early 00's exposed me to very little diversity. I had a couple racially diverse friends growing up, but we all went to the same schools and lived in the same neighborhoods, so I never saw myself or them as different from each other beyond skin pigment. Therefore, when I first heard arguments about white privilege and continued systems of oppression in broader America, I was dumbfounded at first thinking "no, that's not me," but I quickly allowed the ignorance to melt and accepted my position within the system and I know it needs more of my (and everyone's) attention, especially to abate the ignorance, but I'm still struggling to know what I can do, aside from being aware, and get past the discomfort of discussing it. I'm getting a taste of what it might feel like to be a minority this semester, being enrolled in a gender studies course, focused on early French Feminism with discussions of modern feminist issues. I'm one of 2 males in a class of 20+ students. Sometimes the women pose questions to one of us directly, and I become really nervous about answering, worried that I may be eaten for lunch on a discussion post for writing something that comes across the wrong way, or that is truly the wrong way lol. My younger sister, attending Portland State, assures me that its good for me to feel this way.
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